Thursday, April 7, 2011

He whispers loudly

The sun warms my head as it pours through the open sunroof of my vehicle. I feel like a teenager who has just been set free to drive in the sun with the radio blasting, sunglasses on, - and joyfully alone - for the first time. Excited. Elated. Life is good and I am just soaking it up.

It's my lunch hour and I am leaving a meeting where God did one of His amazing God things. He answered a question so loudly, so clearly, that I can barely even talk about it because I sound crazy. You know, one of those stories where you want to tell it, but you think anyone who hears won't possibly believe you are telling the truth. Am I convinced God is so powerful that He would make words come from one person's mouth to another person's (my) ears with no hint, no questions asked out loud, but the answer is exactly, I mean EXACTLY what was requested? Yes. So, I return to work with a sense of awe and carry on with my tasks, remembering every now and then to whisper, "Thank you."

The work day ends and traveling home my thoughts turn to another question nagging at my serenity. I remember how BIG He is and so I ask Him, "Should I?" or "Shouldn't I" get outside of what is comfortable and try something different, something new? It is for my own growth, for my own well-being, isn't it? But it is scary, and I feel the need to evaluate my motives. Am I angry? No. Hurt? A little, but it's not a resentment, it will pass. Am I crazy? No. I need to take care of myself. So I go. It feels odd and uncomfortable, but I sit and wait, and listen, and share. The topic? Taking care of ourselves. Sigh. And again, I realize God has spoken, answered. I am there and I am turning my life and my will over to the care of God, taking care of myself by letting Him take care of me. And He assures me again. And I whisper, "Thank you."

I call out to the LORD,
and he answers me from his holy mountain.
Psalm 3:4

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