Friday, June 29, 2007

"Firsts"

As I review the past week, it seems that I have experienced several "firsts". None of these happenings are really worth "writing home" about, if you will, but they are "firsts", nonetheless.
I flew to spend the weekend in Tulsa. I wanted to spend some time with my mom and also with my niece who turned two a few days before. Going to Tulsa was not a "first" nor was spending time with my mom, but what was a "first" was going shopping with her to buy gifts for my niece and her granddaughter. That was fun. It seems we both had a bunch of fun buying presents for this beautiful two year old in our family. It was a "first", and it seemed sort of important some how. Then I left Tulsa on an airplane and left my daughter with her grandmother....all by herself. This was also a "first". My sons have spent over a decade of periodic visits to Grandma's all by themselves, usually traveling by airplane from Virginia where they grew up. Due to Rebecca's age then, I had to accompany her during her visits. However, this year, I departed, and left her there to spend a few more days alone with Grandma. I was hoping, of course, that they would establish a deeper grandmother/granddaughter relationship, which did seem to occur. Then the other "first" was Rebecca made her "first" flight as an unaccompanied minor. Now, the flight itself is not real long, but she did experience some flying challenges. She had to wait on the runway for nearly two hours before taking off - probably due to an elderly gentleman walking through a door without proper security clearance. She handled it very well and came home very cheerful about her adult accomplishment.
Another "first" was my first root canal. Whew! What an experience! I am what the dental world calls- a "clencher and grinder". One of the ways that I deal with stress is to clench and grind my teeth in my sleep. This is not a good way of dealing with stress. One of the consequences to such behavior is fractured teeth, of which I know have five!! In the past six weeks, I have spent nearly 14 hours in various dental chairs. Without going into the long, drawn out story, yesterday was the "first" day that a long awaited and several times attempted root canal was accomplished! Hooray! Now, I am in a fair amount of pain due to the banging on my tooth that had to occur to have a crown removed prior the the root canal...and a "first" it was to see an endodontist and have this particular procedure. The circumstances surrounding my tooth were also a "first" for my general dentist and also my endodontist, which won me the nickname- in both offices -as "problem child" since I was a "first" for both of them. It is also the "first" time I have been given such a nickname from people who provide my dental care! Ha!
Another "first" was... I invited someone to a Fellowship church Bible Study - and she came! It was her "first" Bible Study ever! WOW! What a great "first" to be a part of. I also realized that it was the "first" time that I have ever attended a Bible Study in some one's home and I did not know anyone at all....except for the one person that I invited....who did not know anyone either. This whole thing is a "first". It is a new phase in my life, and I continue to find my place and my way in this new arena of what God is doing around me! It is a "first" and unlike anything I have experienced before...the way He is teaching me, the way He is using me, the places He is putting me and the the things He is asking of me...all "firsts". Exciting!
It was also the "first" time that Adam was invited to join his father in the man cave...the garage! They did the guy thing, hanging out in the garage together, piddling with the cars, listening to music, and doing the guy thing. That was cool and a "first".
Life is full of experiences, and even at 45 years old, there are still so many things that I haven't done and so many things that I want to do. My mom and I booked our "first" cruise this week. Something we have both always wanted to do...a cruise, and it will be a "first". It will be a "first" cruise for both of us and also the "first" mother daughter vacation! This is cool. It will be both of our "first" time in Jamaica and the Grand Cayman Islands and Cozumel too!
I love "firsts"! I think it is great fun to experience new things!

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

To Live By...

I ponder these words today with the desire to live by them more fully. It is a way of life that I embrace and believe in, but find it difficult to do. Without God, it is impossible. With Him, all things are possible, even this.

Matthew 7:12a
So then, whatever you desire that others would do to and for you, even so do also to and for them...
Luke 6:31
And as you would like and desire that men would do to you, do exactly so to them.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Texas weather

I am confused. I was under the understanding that Texas summer weather was dry and warm, most days. I also understood that Texas had rather frequent thunderstorms (REAL thunderstorms for those of you who have never lived in the southern mid-west) that usually hit in the spring and summer. But frequent???? I sit here this morning, listening to the thunder, strong wind, and rain hit my windows. This has to be the 60th storm in 62 days that has hit where I live in the great state of Texas! We have had too much rain!
When it rains in Texas, it floods. The ground is so flat here, there are no valleys or ravines for the water to run into, so it simply stands, and gets higher and higher. It is dangerous. Even a small shower will cause the roads to be hazardous due to standing water.
And my commute into Dallas today! Let's not even talk about the time it will take to drive, in the rain, into Dallas. Nothing will be going on except the rain. The cars will be going slow, which makes sense, but stopped? Stopped. And for no apparent reason. Just stopped. In the rain. On the highway.
So, on that note, I should get in my car and make that trip in the rain, happily. We are no longer in a drought! And I will have extra time to listen to my new Bon Jovi CD! I won't have to wash my car again today!
Texas weather. Not quite what I expected.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Having a teenage daughter


I believe that I am very blessed to have a daughter. The first two children born into our family were boys, and even though I was happy to have boys and I loved raising our sons, there was something inside of me that yearned for a daughter. I enjoy my relationship with my mother, and as I became a mother myself, I thought it would be neat to carry that mother-daughter thing into the next generation. I was excited to think of dressing a baby in pretty pink, ruffled outfits, and had visions of placing hair clips and bows into flowing long hair. I persuaded Fred to try for this daughter that I dreamed about and when she was finally born, she was everything I ever imagined - except she didn't have much hair. This did remedy itself as time went on and now, at 13, she has beautiful flowing blond hair. What I did not dream about was what my life would be like when my beautiful, sweet daughter turned into a teenager! She did not ask my permission, but one day she went to bed as my princess and the next day I was face to face with a teenage monster. I realized that the first 12 years of her life certainly must have been a set up! She let us all believe she was part of our family, actually an active participant, and then BAM she turned into teenage girl overnight! OH MY! My mother never told me about this. I never took any classes in school preparing me for this. Nobody ever warned me about teenage hormonal mood swings though, and if this is what my own mother had to put up with when I was a teen, the only thing I can say is "I am sooo sorry. Please forgive me!" In the meantime, I spend a lot of time wondering which mood she is in when she enters a room, evaluating the look in her eyes, and deciding if it is safe to ask her if she has put her laundry away. (for the 3rd time) And I listen, with great hope, to the advice I get from mothers of adult daughters. Words like "It will pass" and "It does get better" are my hope and my strength. It must be so, I know some of these daughters, now adults, who's mother's claim to have experienced the same things that I am going through now. And I believe it can happen because there are some moments that I can catch a glimpse of the daughter I know. And I believe that some day on the other side of teenage-hood, a loving, kind, adult daughter will emerge and I can rejoice!

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Prayer

Some time back, I was going through some serious struggles. I had made a big move, leaving good friends, and even one child behind to come to the big state of Texas. My mom had been involved in a serious accident and we lost her husband who was a big part of our family. I had also been struggling with some questions to God, about people who claim to know Him and even serve Him, but seem to easily walk a lifestyle of anger, hatred, abuse, and proclaim "enemy status" toward fellow brother's and sister's in Christ...with seemingly no conviction or remorse. This lead me to search my own heart in regard to the same type of fatal flaws in my own life, wanting desperately to be free of all hatred and bitterness. I sought much counsel during this time, from a counselor, ministers, and trusted friends, but my mother shared with me something that changed my heart and helped me heal and live in the freedom of Jesus Christ! It is a prayer, and I have committed to praying it daily and trying to live it to the best of my ability with God's help (the ONLY way it can be done). Today the prayer is on my heart. It is the...

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury,pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;

to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
Amen

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Birthdays




The last two days, our family has been doing a lot of celebrating. On June 11, our oldest son, Adam, turned 23, and today our middle son, Aaron, turned 20. Both of them have chosen to spend time with family, their celebration of choice. So, we spent a whole day cooking a hamburger and hot dog feast, swimming in the pool...after dark and with a swimming pool disco ball. (very cool pool toy) As I sat back and watched my two grown children and the one who is 13, hang out, play board games, swim, laugh, play, eat, and just spend time together in the kitchen, on the porch and in the pool, I am SO thankful that our two adult kids chose to spend time in that way to celebrate. Aaron's girlfriend, Amy, was also here. She fits right in and everyone loves her. It is such a wonderful blessing to have a family who enjoys being together, by choice, not out of obligation, to celebrate special events in our lives.
Family. What a cool thing. God's way of giving us best friends...built right into our lives and so easy to spend time with when we like each other! It makes sense that I would love to spend time with my husband, and that I would talk to him about most everything. This is a great thing! Also, my mom is one of my very best friends. I don't know if I would enjoy my life nearly as much without my mom. And recently, I realize that I really, really like my kids. They are fun to talk to. They are open and honest. They laugh at me and they make me laugh. I am very grateful that I actually enjoy my kids. They are cool. My favorite way to come home is to spend time with my kids, talking to them about their day. My favorite way to end the day is the same. Well...I like going to sleep with my husband :) - but it is cool to have good conversation with my kids. What a blessing - Family!

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Diversity



I have been thinking recently about ethnic diversity. Rebecca, my daughter, has several friends. One of her very best friends is a beautiful Korean girl. Another one of her best friends is a fellow flutist, who happens to be a lovely young African American girl. One day recently, I saw the three of them together and realized what a beautiful picture of diversity they are. I told Rebecca I wanted the other two girls to come over soon so that I could take some photos of them. I want to frame a large picture and put it in my home, as art, and as a symbol of the total beauty of the three of them, united in friendship, and diverse in culture.

I love it. It is beautiful. I thank God for my daughter (and others) who see people for who they are. Beautiful.

Monday, June 4, 2007

Hair cut

I got a hair cut last week. I told a few people that I was going to cut it, but for most people, it was a surprise! It is interesting how something as simple as a haircut can change an entire outlook. I love the short hair. I was in and out of the swimming pool all weekend, without concern about how my hair would look. To my pleasure, it looked pretty good in between dips.
I love the haircut. It is fun. It is easy. I love the compliments, too!
Life is good. Short hair is great!

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Beginning Blog

I love to read. I love to write. Funny, I even love to read what I write!

Some time back, my son, Adam, helped my mom set up a blog. It was fun listening to them work on the beginning of what was to be her blog site. I read it every few days, and always enjoy being able to read the things that are on her mind and heart. Even though I talk to her quite often, I always learn something new when I read her blog. It has finally inspired me to start one of my own. I have no idea what I plan on writing here...whatever is on my mind, I guess.

So, I will write...on this blog. And I may be the only one who reads what I write, but that is OK. Some things are more about "me". This is one of those things.