Liz's Letters

Have you ever been so overwhelmed that you just want to give up? There is so much to do that you find yourself not doing anything at all? Or discouragement and / or past failures have you paralyzed? I certainly have. Whether my house is so dirty that I don't know where to start cleaning, a project is so big and the due date so close that I simply despair over how impossible it seems, or even relationships have failed and I start to think that they are not worth it after all. Chapter 10 of Self Talk Soul Talk encourages me to press on! Jennifer Rothschild, the author lays out a step by step plan. 1. Turn your feelings into action. I can hear the Nike slogan, "Just do it." Another famous phrase, "One day at a time." Years ago, I made the decision to take the next step. Sometimes, when I can't see the end, or don't know where I am going, I stand there...doing nothing. I learned that if I just take THE NEXT STEP, it will lead to the next one. ...

It is Tuesday, no it is Wednesday. Self Talk Soul Talk Chapter title this week is Chill Out: Be at Rest, O My Soul. The past 10 months, I have been making conscious decisions to "rest". While I lived in Virginia, I was always on the go...working, raising three kids, involved in entirely too many areas of ministry that seemed to be (in my mind) necessary for being part of a church plant. My evenings at home with my family were rare. And then I moved to Texas. Everything stopped. My mom was involved in a tragic accident and I spent about two months 5 hours away from my family while I helped her convalesce. During those months, I discovered how tired I really was. For a good long time, I was in and out of meltdown mode. Crying. Sleeping. Crying. Praying. Crying. When I finally began to cling to God and what he was saying, I knew it was really time for me to reevaluate how He wanted me to spend my time. So, I chose to rest. I have a few people who are holding me accountable to ...

It is Yes to God Tuesday and the title of Chapter 5 in the book Self Talk Soul Talk is Look Back: Forget Not His Benefits, O My Soul. Timely is this chapter for me. Some of you may be aware that I am in " recovery " and am currently working on what recovery programs call step work. Currently, I am working on... Step 4 - Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. And my prayer for my group last week was that I would be able to find the difference between remembering for the sake of healing - - - and obsessing. I had not read this chapter at the time of this request, but isn't God good that He answered my prayer before I even prayed it? Due to where I am currently in my life, my walk with God, the things He has brought me through and what He is teaching me, there are many, many things in this chapter that spoke to my heart. Certainly, I don't want to bore you with repeating all that was written in the book (after all, most of you reading this post have ...

Even the chapter title of Chapter 7, Self Talk Soul Talk causes me to take a deep breath and pause. A counselor once told me that, on a scale of one to ten, (one being "calm", ten being "spun up") she thought I might always function at about a six. I agreed. Since that conversation somewhere around ten years ago, I have spent much time practicing "Calm Down". Seasons of this work have been spent allowing the Lord to still and quiet my soul, but other seasons have been spent like a volcano, erupting at every disturbance. This chapter speaks to the very heart of my thought closet. Seventeen months ago, I began doing things differently in regard to anger in my life. Between months seventeen and thirteen, I failed quite a few times. The result? It seemed like insanity. It felt like I was out of control. I was, but it was not myself who needed to reign me in, it was God. In February of last year, an incident took place in my life where He finally got my attent...

It is Yes To God Tuesday and time to post on Chapter 5, entitled Tune In: Awake My Soul. Struggles have occurred all day as I ponder my thoughts. The roaring lion. He is here today. He is trying to drag thoughts back into my closet, the ones that I am trying to carry to the dumpster! Sentences from inside my head that are not from God. And I wonder, what has happened? Why am I downcast? Have I, like Jennifer says on page 65, become sleepy and apathetic toward some of my poor choices and negative attitudes? Or might I have too many distractions? Tasks, yes? It is a busy week for me at work. Pleasures? Oh, yes. I have had much fun the past few days! Fear of failure? Oh, this is a big one for me. It can sometimes paralyze me. The list of distractions continues. It is good to hear Jennifer remind us that not all distractions are sinful, but when we allow them to keep us from our treasures, they become stumbling blocks. My treasures. I want to keep my treasures front row, ce...

It is Yes To God Tuesdays, and time for my summary of Chapter 4. The title is Speaking Truth To Your Issues. One of the thought questions at the end of the chapter is: What kind of issues crowd your thought closet? Mistakes I have made. Relationships that are unreconciled. I am not good enough. When those are the thoughts that dominate my thinking, I know that I am not allowing the Holy Spirit to control my thoughts, I am not taking every thought captive. (sigh) It is sometimes so hard. Last week, I said "I could practice switching a negative thought to a positive thought, but that won't help me as much as discovering where the negative thought came from in the first place and taking care of that." The answer was in this chapter! It is about my faith! Jennifer writes, " By faith we receive truth. By faith we believe truth. And by faith we act on that truth. Soul talk can never be a substitute for faith.... ...Soul talk is faith's companion, not its replacem...

Another week has passed. Time again for the Yes To God Tuesday on-line Bible Study hosted by Lelia . Chapter 3 title is Choosing Wise Words. I like this. After the last two weeks of realizing how much I need to clean out the thought closet, the negative and hurtful things that I allow to wallow around in my mind, we get to start on the cleaning. It is about the root - specifically, the root cause of the faulty thinking. My mind is hanging on to something incorrect. The root is what allowed these thoughts to get into my head in the first place. Out of that root grows a fruit. The fruit is the way our thinking plays out. Mine plays out by thinking odd things...like..."If he just asked if I needed help, he must think I am doing a poor job." Hmmm. That's not right. So, to get to the root, to find out what makes me think those things; it goes well with the way I prefer to solve problems...get to the bottom of it. Find out the reason why. I could practice switching a negative t...

It's that time again...Yes To God Tuedays, hosted by Lelia at Write From the Heart . The book this time is Self Talk Soul Talk and even though I am a day late in posting, I am excited to be working through this topic with my bloggy buddies! The beginning of this book stirs up things that for so long I thought that I could not control. Years ago, I remember asking my husband how he controlled his thoughts (it seemed to me that he was fairly good at this) and he said he chose not to think about thoughts that were not beneficial. The answer seemed good, but I still couldn't grasp what he was talking about. When he tried to explain further, he used the illustration of a bird flying by, that you just watch it fly over your head but don't let it make a nest. Hmmm. I have managed to do better with this thought control, but have yet to really get a good handle on it and I think this book might just help me with the next steps. It is the stuff in my thought closet! The thoughts tha...

I am so far behind on my Behind Those Eyes post that I was tempted not to do it. Funny, though because I have enjoyed this study so much that it just seems as if I should post nothing else until this one is written. This is the final chapter in what has been a wonderful, thought provoking, friend making, attitude changing and freeing study. When I first decided to participate, it was healing that I was hoping for. So, I love the chapter title, The Truth Heals. I saw that title when I first flipped through the pages of the book, before reading it. I have to admit, I was a little nervous. It was a truth - but a false truth - that had my feelings in the pit, and my authenticity in hiding. I was afraid of the truth because in my mind, "the truth hurts." Recent hurting truths in my life: the broken relationship with the one who I called "best" friend, the death of my father in law, the death of a dear friend day before yesterday, unexpectedly. She was only 51 and had com...

WE ARE COMPLETELY FLAWED YET FORGIVEN COMPLETELY Chapter 9 Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sins are put out of sight. Romans 4:7 NLT I cannot describe in words exactly how wonderful I feel when I read that scripture. I have been a believer for over 20 years. I did not come to accept Jesus Christ as my Savior until I was 24 years old. And it was not a decision that was easy for me. If you were able to ask the ones who knew me during this time, especially my Christian girlfriends who were praying for me, they would assure you that I was a tough nut. It took me nearly 5 years to make that decision. But when I did, I knew I was flawed and forgiven. Time moved forward. I played all the parts that we have looked at in the earlier chapters, Ms. Perfection, Ms. Confidence, Ms. Happiness, and Ms. Spirituality. And then I rebelled. When life was more pretend than it was real, I decided I didn't like it anymore. I had seen things that I didn't want to see....

We are completely loved and accepted completely. That is the chapter title this week and it is such good news! It is news that I have heard before, but news that I was glad to hear again. Lisa's story at the end of the chapter touched my heart...you know, the one where she woke up the morning after her prayer asking God to let her know that they were okay. The song in her head, that really was in her heart is awesome. I have had those times. Recently, I have had quite a few. The last few months (years maybe?) have been a little difficult. Some days I have wondered, "Does He REALLY love me?" And then some sort of confirmation will come along, He will let me know that we are okay and my heart sings. His love is gentle. His love is perfect. His love is comforting. And his love is absolutely unconditional. My blog time is shortened this week due the death in my family. My post is short, but honest and heartfelt. This week, I had a couple of conversations with a good...

Happy Tuesday! It is time for the weekly thoughts on the book study Behind Those Eyes. Check out Lelia's blog for more information and look up the author, Lisa Whittle . Good stuff on both of these blogs! Chapter 6 is entitled, Cosmetics for the Soul. Lisa shared a story about working a part time job at a cosmetics counter. A woman approached, covered, hat, sunglasses and all, because she was hiding horrible scars from burns. Lisa spent around an hour concealing the woman's scars with cosmetics until she felt a little better about what she saw when she looked in the mirror. She used the story to illustrate how we, as women, try to conceal things about ourselves in order to hide the truth and escape rejection from others. This hit home with me when I read it. I will do almost anything to avoid rejection! Lisa say in chapter 6: We use concealer - cosmetics for our souls - that will camouflage those places in our hearts that are uglier than we want to see. I understand....

Hosted by Lelia I know Ms. Spirituality. I spent many years playing her role. I was on the Music team, the discipleship team, writing curriculum, leading a small group, teaching various classes, mentoring one on one, holding a position on a leadership team, and organizing Women's retreats. Whew! Now, I can't say that I was pretending, because I was honestly walking with God and totally enjoyed the ministries that I was involved in...but it was way too much. The verse, "To be spiritually minded is life and peace." Romans 8:6 speaks to me now, but didn't so much then. I did not realize how little peace I had. I was too busy doing to enjoy being. God knew. He showed me. He plucked me right out of that situation and moved my family far away from that entire place. Every time I tried to play Ms. Spirituality in my new circumstances, He stopped me. I had to rest. I had to reestablish my relationship with Him. He urged me to spend all that time that I p...

I just finished reading chapter 3, Miss Confidence, in the Bible Study Behind Those Eyes. ( hosted by Lelia) Lisa Whittle's quotes will be in purple today. When reading this chapter, I realized that Miss Confidence is a part I play quite often, although it is getting more and more difficult as God has given me many lessons on how my only sure confidence is in Him. I found it interesting the way Lisa linked confidence with vulnerability on page 46. Confidence is so often afraid of rejection - either because of past hurts or past experiences - that she prefers to stay in her confident shell and not let the soft side of her emerge. But she soon begins to realize that it's very confined in there. In her book, Strong Women, Soft Hearts, counselor Paula Rinehart talks about this issue in her chapter on vulnerability. She says: The strength of vulnerability is a curious mixture of discovering your heart and sharing your real self, as best you can, with people God has put in you...

(Quotes by Lisa Whittle in Green) The great Sunday Morning Fake Out...do I know anyone who attends worship services regularly that has NOT experienced something almost just like this? I don't think so. There is a song by Casting Crowns, Stained Glass Masquerade , that addresses this same issue. The song ministered to me when I first heard it, still does now, and this story and chapter, hit it exactly. However, I realize that it is really not what I long for-no masquerading for me. Not that I always want to be frazzled and imperfect like I sometimes am, but I do want to be real. So, what is it that makes us want others to see us as "perfect"? Why does it matter? In my life, I have noticed that I have fooled myself into believing that if I am less than perfect, that might mean that I am failing. Whether it be at marriage, parenthood, housecleaning, weight, whatever...if I am not doing it "right", then I must be doing it "wrong". Then, adding to that pres...

Another internet Bible Study has caught my attention, hosted by Lelia . It interested me because authenticity is something I strive for, something that I admire, and something that I believe honors God in our relationships. This book is about seeing what is behind the eyes of women, the untold stories of insecurities or heartaches. I want to be deeply spiritual in my relationships, caring, supportive, and capable. So, by doing this study, I hope to get real with my relationships. In reading the first chapter, the author Lisa Whittle , talks about being a pretender. She says, "Many of us do not go into life wanting to be pretenders, but we have at some point embraced the idea when it suited our desires. ...these cover-ups meet a need at the time to get us more of what we want when we do not believe the truth will." hmmm. I can see where I have done that. I was challenged by this chapter to take authenticity to the next level. The question to be answered: Define the word authe...