Tuesday, June 16, 2009

God is Relentless

God is relentless, that's for sure. He does not give up.

I recently had to give my testimony (a requirement for membership at my church) and was again amazed at the amount of time it took me to turn my life over to Christ. I was 25 years old, but I had 3 really good friends sharing with me and praying for me...for 5 years!

Currently, God has been relentless in pursuing parts of me that I have been reluctant to give to Him. Attitudes. Relationships. Pride. Anger. But He gently moves, day after day, moment after moment, until finally, I am surrendered to Him.

From 1999 until 2008, He had me on a persistent journey. It was rough and I held onto things - people - because I was afraid to be without them. God, however, knew He had better plans for me. I was involved in situations that were damaging to my health, relationships that were tearing me up with abuse and co-dependency, and living in a place that looked remarkably like a pit. Not that life was all bad because it wasn't, but there were some things that God was asking me to let go of and the more He asked, the tighter I held on. Last summer, I was forced to let go. Since then, I have seen things new! I am recognizing truth with new eyes. Things that I felt I could not live without, now living without is so freeing! He did not relent. He continued showing me. And even recently, pursued until the last shred of hurt was gone. All that was, anything related, or connected...now removed. Not by my choice, you see, but by His sovereignty. He has situated me so that He is Everything. He is my best friend. He has sealed me as His! He is the fire that burns within me. He is jealous and wants what is His - my total affection. He is my joy and He is my comfort. My heart was so broken, so shamed, so afraid, that I had no choice but to give it all to Him.

One of the songs that we sing at my church worship service is "You Won't Relent" This song holds a very, very special place in my heart because it tells the story of His work in my life the last many years. I still weep when I sing it because it is work that is still fresh, still soft, and still carries a bit of pain that I have to turn over to Him daily. This past week, at the service, we sang this song again. And again, my affections were stirred to worship a God who never gives up until He has it all.

And I want to give it all.

You won't relent
Until You have it all
My heart is Yours

I'll set You as a seal upon my heart
As a seal upon my arm
For there is love that is as strong as death
Jealousy demanding as the grave
And many waters cannot quench this love

Come be the fire inside of me
Come be the flame upon my heart
Come be the fire inside of me
Until You and I are one


grey like snuffie said...

Thankful He doesn't give up on us...

Paula (SweetPea) said...

Wow. Your blog popped open and a beautiful bright purple flower greeted me, along with a new blog look. How beautiful.

Your post is beautiful full of grace and humility.

This struck me:
"Things that I felt I could not live without, now living without is so freeing!"

Only God can do that, show us that, and allow that transformation.

nAncY said...

wonderful sharing!

thank you :-)

Laura said...

Amazing song, amazing God.

(and I too love the redecorating!)

You are such a blessing, Liz. I love your openness and your sweet, sweet heart.


Letters From Midlife said...

I appreciated your testimony. I'm also glad God does not give up on me even when I give up on myself. Thank you for sharing your heart.