Tuesday, June 24, 2008


A fire burns behind me
I run to keep ahead
Those who I once cared for
becoming cold and dead

Red and black the flames grow high
Smoke rises in the air
The pain of my unworthiness
Seems more than I can bear

In front of me I see the sun
I long to feel it's heat
The iciness inside my heart
has paralyzed my feet

I see the moon, I see the stars
They swirl and dance for me
I see the hole, the big dark hole
Where one star used to be


Mary Ann said...

good grief. sorry baby.

Lizerd said...
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Tina said...

this is for the anonymous commentor. It seems to me that you are the one who needs to do something right here. Sign your name to your post! As far as Liz's "followers" I'm assuming you meant friends as the last time I checked she wasn't running a cult, church, or any other kind of organized group that would have followers. I consider her to be a close friend and have read her blog as a way of keeping up with what is going on in her life. I have not found her or her words to be stabbing or evil much less hurtful, vindictive, and mean spirited. I believe we all have it in us to be all of those things at one time or another (such as the post I am addressing). I have read blogs where Liz has owned less than perfect behavior and talked about her struggle to become the person God intends her to be. You seem to have some serious feelings towards Liz. I would say the YOU need to take a good, long look at yourself and examine your motives. I happen to know that Liz has and often takes good long looks at herself regarding her relationships. She is not perfect but she is a wonderful caring friend. Your post came off as a "to take your words" mean spirited attack on her. You could not possibly know the true reasoning behind her poem. You have "assumed" much and I think in error. The woman I believe you are referring to when you tell her to let her be GONE is an adult and fully capable of telling her that if that is what she desires. I did not find the poem to be dark I happen to know somewhat of the state of mind Liz was in when she wrote it as she had shared with me some of her feelings. It seems an appropriate and honest expression of those feelings. Please take your own advice and be GONE from this blog. Or at least be honest enough to put your name to your posts and own your behavior.

Jon said...
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Jon said...
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Lizerd said...
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Anonymous said...
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Lizerd said...

AMEN, Anonymous! Well said.

After feeling responsible myself, for trying to "make right" what I was aware of, God has finally managed to get through my very thick head that HE will deal with it and I can let go. And oh how close I have had to draw to Him in effort to do that.

I pray for them fervently, daily, sometimes even more, that God will bring a miracle of healing in their lives. I still love Ruth with all of my heart and even have managed to love Steve again. God is truly faithful and a miracle worker, I can testify to that simply because of His work in my heart there.

God has worked and is working in SCC and He has many followers there who love Him. I do pray that they will always look to Him for their example. And I know that those like Jon, and even myself, that found ourselves hurt and in pain, will find healing and joy as God has given us a wonderful opportunity to become more like Him!

Thank you for the comment, I could not have said it better!
As you think on this situation, pray that God will reign in the lives of all affected!

God is good and he is faithful. I can honestly express joy and trust in Him.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

I know how difficult this has been for you to try to be the best friend that you were to her even when he was being abusive in a very un-Christ-like manner. God will use this sad course of events to continue to draw you closer to Him. I pray that they will seek Him as well as He is the great Physician and I truly believe there is an illness in their lives that they need to address.

It breaks my heart that there are those, like Jon, who have truly sought God and have had to learn the hard way that the pastor who you think is "the Real deal" is a hypocrite like so many others.

This church was supposed to lead those to Christ who had been turned off by the traditional and quite often hypocritical churches/pastors who give Christianity a bad rap. What a shame! But, that is for God to deal with. I just pray that the good people of SCC are looking towards Christ and the Word for guidance and not the pastor and his wife for role models in how to become a strong "Christ-follower".

Monday, August 11, 2008